Christmas Eve 2013

          It's Christmas Eve 2013. I just finished watching, 'It's a Wonderful Life' for the umpteenth time and in typical Kev fashion, have arrived at my all too familiar blubbering idiot status that always surfaces at the end of an emotional movie.

          The film's brilliance cannot be understated. The central themes of the interconnectedness of people and the richness of having family and friends reverberate throughout the picture. The latter theme is the one I'm focused on this evening.

          For the past 11 years, my boys have spent Christmas Eve with their mother and her side of the family. This has always been an acceptable arrangement for me. As much as I want them here with me every single second during the holiday season, I fully recognize both the importance and fairness of them spending time with their mother and relatives on her side of the family. It has always been more about them and their well being moreso than my own since the divorce in 2003 and the Christmas Eve arrangements fit in with that line of thinking.

          I have no problem keeping myself busy while they're visiting and am nowhere near emotional distress during the time they're gone. Yet, I find myself looking at the clock every so often, calculating a countdown of sorts until they arrive back home around 9:00/10:00 in the evening.

          In the movie, George Bailey comes home after searching high and low for the missing $8,000. His distress is immediately evident in the scene, as he snaps at his children and wife and grumbles about his rotten day. At one point though his son is putting tinsel on his head when he suddenly pulls his boy close and hugs him tightly. One can surmise from this action that George is terrified over the thought he may go to prison and in turn, lose the family life so many of us cherish.

          What are we without our family? Who I am is so deeply defined by my role as a father that it's hard to remember the time before I was a parent. It's been the single greatest journey of my life, hands down. I don't want to even approach the thought of losing the family life I cherish. George had a moment in the film where he had to face it, and we saw his understandable reaction.

          'It's a Wonderful Life' is of course fiction, but there is undeniable truth within. Watching the movie wasn't a reminder of how rich my own life is, as I am well aware of that each and every day. Rather, it brought those feelings even more to the surface this evening.

          My boys will be home in a few hours. I may hug them a little more tightly than I may have had I not watched that film today. I may listen to their words even more intensely than I may have had I not watched that film today. I may appreciate this year's Christmas with them a little more than I may have had I not watched that film today.

          George Bailey is the richest man in Bedford Falls.

          I have him matched here in Janesville, Wisconsin on Christmas Eve, 2013.